Caron
Caron B. Goode, ED.D., NCC, DAPA
Dr. Caron Goode is gifted with compassion in assisting others to effect lasting transformation through spiritual coaching, books, classes and seminars. Caron’s continuous education, experience in psychology and professional writing makes her a great resource for parents wishing to create and maintain a nurturing relationship their children. The common thread of these disciplines is energy of the mind-body-spirit connection and how to access it, bring it into focus and then put it into successful action.
Caron’s has shaped all of her professional endeavors into an educational program for training and certifying parents and professionals in supporting families through parent coaching or to receive a first-class, leading-edge parent education. She has positioned the Academy for Coaching Parents International (www.acpi.biz) at the forefront of the parent coaching movement to disseminate the coaching model of empowerment for parents.
She’s quoted often as a parenting expert and her articles have appeared in over 300 publications globally; including Colorado Parent, Convergence, The Joyful Child, Energy, Black Family Digest and Better Homes and Gardens. Caron’s is a frequent radio show guest speaking on topics like “Parenting outside the Box.”
In addition to directing the Academy of Coaching International (ACPI), Caron also manages www.heartwiseparent.com, which provides strategies for parenting the whole child. This holistic approach supports children’s physical health, emotional fluency, mental development, and spiritual enrichment. She also founded Intuitive Parenting & Intuitive Children web site, which offers specialized training for parents and parent coaches. (www.academyforcoachingparents.com)
Dr. Goode graduated with a Doctoral Degree from George Washington University in 1983 and is a licensed psychotherapist. She completed post-doctoral certifications in Wellness and Women’s Spirituality at the Institute for Transpersonal Psychology. In addition, she holds the titles of National Certified Counselor and Diplomat of the American Psychotherapy Association.
My name is Cari, and i have just recieved a call from my sister saying thet her daughter has been seeing a ghost in their new house. My niece is 3 years old and says she sees this ghost named Ben and when she speaks about him she covers her right eye. My niece says he only has one eye! She says that he pulls her hair and hurts her. My sister is quite concerned and is not sure how to handle the situation being her daughter is only 3! If you could please get back to me with any information to help the situation, that would be wonderful! Sincerely Cari.
Thanks for bringing this t my attention. Please report the progress to assist others also. Thanks
Hi Tara…Thank you for taking the time to respond! Since you have responded my daughter has been visited by 4 Angels. All she would say about them was “they are here to tell me something”. No idea as yet as to WHAT it was. She only said that they looked like the Angels I have on a blanket on the couch ! I would appreciate if you were able to forward this info to Caron. I am adding my original message and your comment for reference!! I am not sure I understand the “bleedthrough” that you mentioned, what exactly you had meant about alternative schooling options, and other than my repeatedly telling her NOT to say something to anyone about the spirits HOW else I could possibly be pro-active in helping her “adjust” in school and othewise! Thank you!
******************************************************************
Hi Caron I have a 4yo daughter who I believe is psychic and has been from the start. When she was about 2yo she used to see a “Man With The Spiders” wearing a jacket and a hat. Even at 2yo it was a very clear description of what was REALLY scaring her to DEATH~! I asked her recently if she still saw the “Man With Spiders” and she said “No he is gone!”
She told me around the same time when I asked her to do something and she wasn”t budging! She said “Mama, I an old lady!!!!” She went on later to say that she had 4 babies who were all in heaven now. She describes that they were in a car when they went to heaven and that “blood was everywhere” as she points to her knees and says they are broken!!! She has even had an episode where she seemed to be confused saying” I have to go help my babies with their boo-boos…I have to help them…I have to go to heaven now!” Physically she was trying to get away from me pulling to get out of my grasp! This was during the daylight hours…not at night when she was sleeping! On that topic…she is restless most nights and does a bit of talking in her sleep but most are unintelligentable.
She also has seen spirits that she says are “scaring her”…the most recent one just a few days ago…she said it was a man she didn’t know. Later that day we were notified of the passing of her father’s cousin who was 58yo around the time that she saw the man. That instance was very similar to one that she had for her father’s aunt who passed away a year and a half ago when she was 2yo. She RAN to me on this one to HIDE near me under the covers of the bed!
About a month ago she told me that my mother was with her in the livingroom playing lego’s with her. As much as I believe that she really does not know how to lie at this point (she has not started preschool as yet). I asked her to ask my mother a few questions that she had no idea what the answers were….let alone understand the question!!!! All the questions were answered correctly!! From what her favorite drink was when she was here on earth? to What was the color of her car when she was here on earth? Lastly to What she missed the most since she was in heaven! The third one brought me to tears as you can imagine!!!
I am a stay at home mother and as much time as I spend with her…she is constantly coming to find me! She has to KNOW where I am at all the time! She seems to do this way more with me than with her father who HAS been known to actually SEE and/or feel my mother’s spirit several times!!!
So that said……I could REALLY use some input as to how to handle this gift that she appears to have. I do believe in the “psychic realm” BUT we are Catholic and she is due to start Catholic Preschool on August 29th!!! I do want to stifle this gift if at all possible but HOW do you explain to her at 4yo that it is ok to talk about it to some people and not to others!!! The poor kid has enough to think about as it is!!!
I would appreciate any guidance you may be able to offer me regarding my daughter!
******************************************************************
Cheryl,
It sounds as though you have quite a little girl on your hands and I can imagine how challenging this must be for you. Although I am not the expert with the scary side of psychic experiences (my two youngest are psychic, but not with the fear), it sounds like the story your daughter relives with herself as a woman who lost 4 children is a past life bleed through she still remembers here in this existence. I think working with someone who can help her heal the energy or even sitting with her and allowing her to talk it through would be helpful (Caron may be able to assist with the bleedthrough as I have had many myself).
She is evidentally very connected to the spirit realm and it doesn’t sound like this has changed much in her short few years here. As for the school situation, if you feel she would understand the difference sharing these experiences with you and not talking about them in school, talk with her about it however, she may have these experiences in school which could lead to her being distracted or losing focus which can lead to people misinterpreting her actions as attention deficit or some other diagnosis. Just be prepared for the possibility. See how it goes or you may have to consider another schooling option. Unfortunately, this is occuring for a lot of children and the first, best step is being aware of it as her mother. It may not be easy, but they are the gifts she has and they are very real so they need to be paid attention to.
I hope this helps you some and if it brings up more questions, please don’t hesitate to contact us.
Hi Cheryl,
Do you think at age four your daughter can remember to NOT say anything at preschool? That’s a lot to expect from a playful young child. Her inner world with angels is as real to her as having a pet kitten, and she would want to tell others about her kitten. Why be embarrassed by her gift? Why be careful she might mention it outside the home? We like to accept any child’s gift, whether musical or psychic, and help them feel good about it themselves. Please explain more so I can understand the situation better about the preschool. Then we can assist with some proactive suggestions. Thanks
Caron
Cheryl,
A “bleedthrough” is an energetic memory we bring into this lifetime about a past life experience we had. If your daughter told you she remembers being this older woman with 4 children and can remember what happened to them, she is most likely remembering her own experience quiet vividly.
In terms of schooling options, I was only suggesting that based on your concern about being Catholic and her going to Cathoic school and discussing this with people, perhaps you would be more comfortable with other options that are available. I am with Caron in that I am not concerned about my children discussing this with people, but I have explained to them that some people will embrace it while others won’t understand it b/c it’s not a part of their belief system or experience.
My son is extremely sensitive to his environment and the people in it, so for his comfort level I looked into other schooling options so he could continue to grow and develop within his gift without the mainstreet public school potentially turning it into something other than what it is, a gift. We are not affiliated with any specific organization, so it is easy for me to embrace and accept all people’s experiences and belief systems without an opinion or judgement; it’s not always that easy for other people to accept. In the end, it’s also how comfortable we are as parents with allowing our children to unfold naturally without allowing outer influences to affect how we nurture them.
Lots to think about these days and I wish you the best in working with your daughter on these things.
Hi Caron….As you can see Tara has commented regarding our schooling situation. We have her registered to start Catholic School on the 29th! If it were just MY belief I would NEVER stifle her Gift!! I have actually been “warned” not to have her mention this in school. The woman mentioned that she could possibly be “labeled” as being ADD or worse! I have no idea what to expect or IF these spirits will distract her when she is in school. I absolutely LOVE the COMFORT my daughter has with BOTH worlds at this point! My daughter is very advanced for her age…inside AND out! It never ceases to amaze me to think that a religion that preaches “God has promised us Eternal Life” AND “the Holy Spirit”…yet would discredit these gifted children!? I hope that helps somewhat! Proactive solutions would be great!!
my child is 8 years old. she was born with hydrocephalus. she is also missing a little sliver of her brain.She acts very normal and does very good in school just like all her fellow students. She has always played with imagineary friends. Lately she has told me and my wife she is seeing dark shadows walking around and it seems to frighten her.
Her favorite imaginary friend is named africa. She seems obsessed with recording her own voice and then talking back to it. I have not seen anything but i cant help but wonder about this behavior. Am i just an over protective father or is there somthing there.
Hi Ed,
It has been quite sometime since you posted this, but I thought an attempt to contact you was worth a try. My daughter, who is now nine, also had an imaginary friend named Africa, until she was five years old. I find it interesting that our children’s friends have the same name.
Just wondering if you would like to talk about it and compare experiences.
Kathy
Hello Caron,
I’m 13 years old and I believe I am Intuitive. I have been since I can remember but it over the coarse of the year I’ve realize the people weren’t just my imagination. When I was 7 my house burned down, but a month before it did I had dreams of my house burning down. I never told my family this while I was having the dreams because I believed them to be just dreams. Although I remember be hesitant to go to bed because of the fright of the house burning down when I was asleep. After however, I told them and my teacher along with most of my classmates. Since then I have had dreams of things before they happen such as scoring the winning goal at a soccer game to entire school days. When I have the dreams about school days, I keep telling my friends “We did this yesterday.” and they respond, “No we didn’t”. I haven’t had a whole lot of Intuitive stuff for a while but over the summer and now I’ve seen ghosts/Spirits (or whatever your suposed to call them) around the house. Last night I saw my first spirit that I believed as so. He looked as if he had been blown up in a war. This scared me terribly and I ran upstairs. Later I saw him in the bathroom while I was using the toilet (what a perv!) I looked the other way and when I looked back, he left. I have now told my parents everything and we are looking for help. If you have any advice for me and my parents, please contact me. Thankyou
Hi Charlotte,
Thank you for writing. Moreover, thanks for having the courage to seek help. You certainly have deja-vu, that is, seeing things before they happen. as for seeing a spirit, it would be helpful if I could find out what was going on in your thoughts and emotions at the time that ghost appeared to you?
Also ask me questions so I know what help you are seeking? I am happy to help.
Hi,
I am so grateful I found your page. Would you please give me some guidance? My son Alex who is 5 told me he saw a ghost in his room, his face was kind of a shapeless, had big eyes and no visible ams, was wearing boots. This presence scared him and when I told him perhaps it was a “good” ghost, or an angel, he said he was bad.
The story would seem like a figment of his imagination, except for his history. Ever since he was born, I ( who usually do not believe in such things) sensed a “negative” presence around him, I would even try to swat it away and could see him as a baby following it with his eyes. Once a scratch appeared on his forehead and bleed a bit out of nowhere. By the time he was 2/3 he started having night terrors, and now at 5, he sleeps clenching his teeth with his jaw so tight I can’t open it when I try to help him.
He tells me of nightmares and sometimes says disturbing things. Once he reported seeing someone in the bathroom and when I went to check and found no-one, he was very surprised, and then said, very matter of factly, oh it most be one of the “shadows” as he calls them.
Recently, while on vacation at an older cottage in Canada I peeked out of the bathroom and saw him smiling and waving at someone, except he was in an empty room. Later on I read about the innkeeper who had died in that place. When I went to put his pj’s on, he said he didn’t want “them” to see him naked!
Do you sense anything? Can I help him in some way? He seems scared about the shadows. Could it be a good visit from a deceased relative?
Thanks for your advice,
Paola
Hello Paola
Sorry it took so long for a response Please give me your son’s name and the country in which you live, and I will look through his eyes and discern what I can. Yes I feel he sees with his inner eyes.
Caron
Paola
I see Alex’s name now. So never mind that first response. First of all when I see Alex in general, he does appear tired or energetically drained. So if you out your hand on your heart and ask, “What is draining alex’s energy is ….?” the answer is what? As a mom, why does he seemed fatigued to you besides a lack of sleep? When I look at Alex’ solar plexus, the place of vitality, i see an energetic hose syphoning his energy. When I go to the other end of the hose, I do see the nonphysical world of Alex’s as a place of shadows.
He can see them. In his perception, they can see him. This is the time for you to speak with your son about who and what is really in his world. don’t tentatively try to tell him what he sees. He knows, and to him, they feel bad, meaning energy draining and tiring. Let him guide you as to what his reality is. In turn, you become the leader, and take charge of this situation so your son can get sleep.
1. With your son, tell the ghosts to go elsewhere.
2. If you desire more information about them then have your son ask? Who are they? What do they want? Do they want to go to the light? A place that is more peaceful? If he refuses to speak with them, then use parental leverage, Would he like to be scared every night or have his room back?”
3. Have your son call in a “teacher of Light” and then wait with him until someone arrives. In other words, find your son a being of light who can respond to him and to whom he feels a connection.
Let me know how your taking charge of the situation works. Alex is forcing you to find your intuition and lead him. Expecting him to do so without some guidance gives both of you a great place to enter this psychic game together. The ghosts are not in charge of his reality. You and he are.
On another note, Alex had a gluten sensitivity, which is an allergy that causes colon inflammation and digestive difficulty. could be the cause of the fatigue. Get him off gluten, and some of the symptoms may clear up. Why? Distress and lack of sleep bring adrenalin-pumping cortisol into the body. Chronic distress brings heightened temporal lobe activity and psychic awareness. along with this, I would cut any sugar intake to none after 3 PM and see if he doesn’t sleep better. Please let us know how Alex progresses.
Hi Caron,
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for your answer. I had been looking for it everyday, but just found it today.
You are absolutely wonderful and so generous with your gift of insight..
It’s interesting that you see Alex as tired. He has dark circles around his eyes and looks fatigued most of the time, although he is quite happy, very sociable and energetic.
I’ve suspected he has allergies since he was very young since he had bad eczema, noisy breathing and poor appetite. However, we’ve done exhaustive testing and have not been able to pinpoint the culprit. I will definitely look into gluten, since that sensitivity runs in my family. Without imposing on you, do you see any more allergies by any chance? I’ve suspected food colorings, millk, pollen and dust.
(By the way, I am the one having a lot of digestive problems lately, and I was thinking of having a doctor explore gluten.)
Yesteday Alex heard a voice, which really startled him. He could’t really make out what it said, but maybe this “shadows” are trying to communicate??
We’ve done a few things. First, a good friend who is very spiritual, Michel, gave me two portraits of catholic saints, which I have placed next to his bed. We also talked about how Angels can protect him when mommy and daddy are not there. This seems to comfort him.
How exactly do we call a Teacher of Light? Would it be useful to have a healer help us do this?
In an abundance of caution, I also sprayed a bit of holy water around his room and dabbed it on his head. Every night we are doing a little ritual to make the bad dreams stay away. We make the sign of the cross with holy water on his forehead, and yesterday he wanted to do it on mine. He hasn’t had any nightmares for the last couple of days.
On another level, I have set up and appointment with a child psychologist to see if there are any issues behind his bad dreams. Do you have any advice for our meeting?
In terms of looking into my heart for the reason for his energy drain, I feel there might be a connection to my “darkened’ energy. I work as a newscaster and every morning, while he is sleeping, I read all the reports of the people who have died in the city as a result of all sorts of accidents and crimes. Having to deal with all this evil and negativity first thing in the morning, drains me. Could I be channeling this to him, since we are so close? Could the energy from usually violently murdered people I am talking about on-air be somehow coming over to him through me?
I was also wondering what exactly is this place of shadows you see in his non-physical world? I am so new at this, please explain….
Thank you, once again!
P.
Hi Paola
would you be willing to schedule an appt with me to cover the rest of these questions. I feel like I would rather speak to you personally rather than keep writing. We have four things we need to cover:
1.Food allergies for you and Alex as well as how to find a clear diagnosis. All of the symptoms you describe are allergy related and weaken the immune system. So I’d like permission with you to do a full medical reading on Alex. his inner terrain is stressed.
2. Your intuition is very good and I do feel you know Alex well. So let’s discuss the connection between your work and Alex fears since his emotional bond to you is strong. You need some coaching here in energy cleansing.
3. I’ll explain the non physical world as I see it.
4. The rituals you are doing are so good! Right on there. I want to connect with you so we can see how alex sleeps at night and if the problem is physical health or emotional health.
I am a psychologist, doctoral level, and a psychotherapist, and I do not see any need for Alex ti be tested or be in therapy. I also understand that as a parent, you would like to cover all of your bases.
Let me know if we can connect. I live in TX.
Caron,
My granddaughter Alexis is 8, just today she was pulled out of school.. the school called her mom and said she was suicidal and that she needed to see a specialist. this was the first her mom and dad had heard anything about this. Alexis finally told them that she was seeing ghost and hearing them screaming at her all the time, well we all knew that she seen and talked to her great-grandmother whom she was 3 months old when my mom passed, and she talks and sees her uncle Wayne, (my son, who died at 25, 3 years ago).. Her parents and i have always believed that she was seeing them and talking to them because of the things she was saying she would have no way of knowing unless she really was talking to them, because of her being so young.. Anyway, she was afraid to tell anyone that she has been seeing other spirits forever too.. Her mom just assumed they were imaginary friends like every other kids have when she was younger. But now, she is seeing ones that are scaring her to death. She is afraid to go to bed at night, she sees them in her room, in her sisters room. Every where she goes.. Now today, i get a call from my son, he is crying like a baby, telling me the school is sending his dr to a hospital for suicidal kids.. what scares him is he used to work for DHF, which took care of kids in that hospital that had been put there, and he said that there way of dealing with this situation is to medicate the child because they do not believe in psychics and such..
My question is, what can we do to help her to not see the ones that are scaring her? She told her mom that her uncle Wayne tells her everything is going to be alright, but as soon as he leaves, the one that keeps pacing at the foot of her bed tells her that he doesnt know what hes talking about, that the only way to make all the ghost leave her alone is to kill herself.. She is just a baby! She is the sweetest child in the world, the most lovable, and its breaking our hearts that this wonderful little girl feels like she needs to kill herself to not have to deal with this anymore..
another thing, we live in a small town.. My son and his wife are strapped financially, they are barely surviving so being able to take her to a specialist is out of the question, there is no way they can afford it.. Please tell me if there is anything we can say to help her to deal with this..As of this moment she is still at the hospital, it all happened today. but the voices and seeing the ghost apparently has been going on for a long time, but she just now told them about it this morning after the school called. She said the reason she hadnt told them sooner was because she didnt want to scare them.. thank you,
Caron~
My 13 year old daughter Jessica, has just recently saw a tall black figure walk out of my room and past her where she was in the bathroom twice. The next day she said she was in class and she looked up at her teacher who was talking and saw the exact black figure standing next to her teacher. She is so scared now, and does not want to be alone in the house. She does not know if this is a female or male.She keeps telling me that this black figure is after her. I am very worried about her.I am going to get some white sage and smudge the house this weekend. Any suggestions? Callie
Hello Shari
At this point, we cannot give advice as to how to help Alexis on the Internet. There are too many details we do not know and it would require a private consultation, preferably by an intuitive therapist or counselor in your area. If all of you understand the inner world, then hearing voices that tell her to kill herself will be considered a psychosis, and any professional would recommend getting help. A teacher or adult who works with children, by law in most states, is required to report such suicides and other serious statements on behalf of the child’s best interests.
Inner guidance is not negative, does not tell children to kill themselves, and requires professional experience for dealing with this now. Either that or you need to get your granddaughter specific training for use of her intuition with a sold spiritual foundation. If she has been in contact with the other side for this long, then she may or may not be capable of telling them to close the door, go away and leave her alone. We don’t have enough of the history here as to what triggered the events and stressors she might be under.
Ask more specific questions if you can frame them, and we will respond as we are able.
Hi Caron,
I have identical 10 year old daughters. I am a skeptic. One daughter, Caryn, has always been incredibly sensitive, and somewhat anxious. When my yoga teacher and unadmitted psychic friend first saw her, she exclaimed “oh indigo”. I didn’t understand what that meant, and to be honest, still don’t. I read through the book Indigo Child and my daughter is nothing like those children. Lately Caryn has confessed that she sees spirits at night. She is afraid to walk in any room by herself, day or at night, and tells me they walk towards her. She describes them as “the black dots we see at night, except they take the shape of a person”. What is my child seeing? How can I make her feel safe? Is this her imagination? I do not believe in ghost, or at least I don’t want to… my other daughter confessing to only seeing this a few times. She is far less sensitive. Please e-mail me with any advice.
Hi catherine
Skepticism is healthy and labels aren’t necessary. I prefer to look at a child as the person they are and then see what needs assistance, if any. Finally, thank you for asking how you can make her feel safe – she is your first priority, not a ghostly image etc.
I need a little more info if you don’t mind supplying it. “Lately she confessed to seeing spirits…” – I do not see the spirits as being around her or in her environment, which means what she sees comes from inside her and her mind wants to get her attention on a matter
Please define lately in terms of time?
Tell me from a mom’s viewpoint, why did she confess to seeing spirits? Fear based, you think?
What is new and different in their lives that could be stressful within the last 6 months? Diet? something at school? strained relations in the family? people in the household who yell.
I don’t want to pry into your life psychically, and so ask that you tell me what is going on. here is my take. Your daughter is empathic and sensitive. You know her well and these are a double edged sword for pubescent girls. I see in her body that she is just at the edge of hormonal change and for sensitive children, even the slightest tweak is enough to feel growing pains, especially in young girls, and sensitive girls feel it in their bodies.
A gynecologist in Tyler Texas wrote a book called Athena Awakening and addresses young girls psychosomatic symptoms of the unease that arises if they are sensitive. This is a good thing, not at all negative.
Now the question is what goes on in Caryn’s psyche to address that causes her to be on edge and feel scared? Catherine, it can be as simple as a drinking a mountain dew and putting aspartame in her system, or if she is sensitive to sugar, eating a donut and the sugar irritates her nervous system. My sense it is within the emotional atmosphere of her environment–school and home. If you fill me in, I can respond with how to help.
Hi,
My name is Wendy and I live in Ohio I believe in spirits and have had experiances with them never scary…just sense they were there and things would happen mostly in a old house I rented, I talked to my landlord and told him I knew someone had died in the house and asked him to confirm it, he avoided the question at first but finaly said yes it was his father….I even told him what room it was that the person died in and again he confirmed I was right. I told his father I had no problem with him staying in the house if he wanted to but he would have to stop moving things in the house and stop all activity that was going on….I also told him I had tried to respect the house and make improvements to get it back to the way it was like stripping painted cabinets and putting up a fence to help make the house livable for me and to help my landlord in the future, and I loved my landlord alot…….Things stopped after that but I would not sleep in the room the man had died in.
Now my niece through marage has a 3yr old son who will be 4 in Jan. is seeing ghosts and will not sleep in his room and will not be any place at all without someone with him, he sees more that one and told a family friend today he didnt go to preschool today because the ghost kept him up talking to him all night. My great nephews name is Ronell and he is afraid of loud noises like fireworks and such and has a great fear of odd things like rubber things that have odd surfaces like a rubber braclet with soft rubber spikes.
My niece his mom has not always made the best choices and is on government assistance……she does not have a computer so I thought I would try to search for some answers for her on the internet I found monster spray but I dont think that is what this lil boy needs I think he may really see something and dont want to give him false hope with monster go away spray if he is really seeing things and then have him not trust adults when the fake spray does not work. He told the family friend the spirit is bad and mean…..
when his Mom and others ask what the look like he just says a ghost looks he does not give any names or say what they say but is very, very scared…….His Mother said she has always felt uncomfortable and just about all other houses she has rented but in this one she feel good in and now her son is afraid…and she doesnt know what to do to help him. The house they live in now, I have never been there myself as she lives in a finished attic that would be like on the third floor and I cant do that many steps. What can you suggest I tell her to help him.
Hi Wendy,
I can give you several books for you and your niece that will help explain Ryder’s sensitivity and how to handle his startle responses, sensitivity to loud sounds etc. If you get the books on amazon.com, go for it. Raising Intuitive Children & Raising Sensitive Children. This will help your niece understand more.
The dislike of rubber or other textures is not abnormal for his age. Unless there is a negative psychological association to the rubber that you don’t know about, then those aspects pass as children’s nervous systems develop.
There are two aspects to consider of Ryder’s experiences. First children who have a gift usually have it consistently, not on and off. Second, clear clairvoyance is not usually about scary monsters, but includes a variety of different types of images and responses, most of which are supportive and not negative experiences only.
So my point is that it really doesn’t matter whether at age three, Ryder has a gift or his imagination is on over time, coping with a healthy or unhealthy emotional environment. The fact is he sees, it scares him and action must be taken by a proactive parent. Here are my rules of thumb:
1. Listen and don’t ask questions. The more you listen, the more you will understand about the nature of his experiences.
2. Help him understand the images in the way he knows how to express – through playing. Sit down and color with different colors and let him tell you about it. Get puppets and pretend a game about the monster in the room. Act it out. Let Ryder be the monster and you be him. Run away, scream in fun, laugh, run into and hug each other. Think of how you can bring levity to the situation.
3. Once you have this level of playfulness about it, then go on a monster hunt. Don’t use gadgets or gimmicks. You are right to say that you want to empower your niece and Ryder to tell the monster to go away, close an imaginary door, find it a new home, send it to the right and to the light until Ryder is satisfied that the monster is gone. If it isn’t gone, then let Ryder tell you what to do next. Empower him to come up with an answer, even if you say, It’s okay. we can’t think of one right now. We’ll know tomorrow.”
The monsters represent something going on inside of Ryder. Since I slept under the covers for years as a child, I understand this is hard for a parent to hear, but parents need to hear, and I thank you so much for asking about this.
But I have to tell you that children can see monsters because they live on a junk food diet and one can of diet soda can activate neural damage in sensitive children over time. Allergies, irritability, falling alseep and heightened adrenalin can make children’s imagination see things. So can stressful environments, that are environmentally unhealthy or emotionally strained.
I would say to all parents of young children, you have to consider these options within Ryder’s environment and emotionality. Little children cannot tell the difference between the real world and the imaginal world. Their brains think of all images as real.
I hope this is helpful. In turn, it would help me if you let me know how you helped the situation and if it was resolved. Thank you.
Hi again Wendy,
Excuse my mistake in calling Ronell by the name Ryder, My hands kept typing in response, and I did not correct my error. However I wanted to add that with your gift, I envision that you put you hand on your heart, and expand the bright light there, and hold your other hand to Ronell’s heart, and send the healing light and love that your heart holds to his. This direct transfer of love seems to calm the child’s nervous system and give him strength. He is bright and aware, yet shy. So that physical touch and energetic support would help a lot.
peace
Hello & Thank You Caron,
No problem on the name….lol
I talked to my niece about writting you, and told her of some of the things I had read that you have written to others. I didnt know till now that she has a fear of anything paranormal as do alot of people.
But I wonder if she may have transfered this to her son, I will talk to her about what she may have said infront of him in the past and to just be alot more aware in the future. I will relay the information about the books I think that can help her alot in daily life with understanding her son and his fears. Also I will try the transferance with him as he always wants me to play with him or sit by me or be on my lap when I would see him at my brothers house.
It bothers my brother alot and he will tell Ronell to leave Aunt Wendy alone….I alway stick up for Ronell and tell my brother its OK, I dont mind at all, my brothers younger daughter always did it also and still does now at age 12. I love kids alot but never had any of my own. Thanks for the fun ways my niece can try to connect with Ronell on his level to get him to open up and or move on……but I think the books would be a great idea.
Thank You for being here for peolpe to talk to about this subject, its a hard one to talk to a doctor about without them thinking your a nut case. Happy Holidays……Wendy
Hi Wendy,
You are insightful. What I am finding in responding to parents is their own fear of the unknown comes up, and they want desperately to help their children, but who is going to help the parents? You see why we started the blog. That is why Raising Intuitive Children must get out there by word of mouth as much as possible so parents can see that their children have a form of intuitive intelligence, the new kid on the block, and yet, not much has been written about working with intuitive children.
Can parents fears transfer to their kids? You bet, and it is more complicated than that. A sensitive child, and ALL young children, feel their way through their environment, so they feel the parents feelings and take their cues accordingly.
Go for it Wendy!
Hi Caron,
My 9 year old daughter has been waking up every night at 1:00 and then has a hard time going to sleep again, sometimes she is up for 3 hours after that. She says that she is afraid to go to sleep. She also says that she has been seeing dark figures and dreaming that we have a ghost in our basement. She says that the figures aren’t scary, she is scared because she thinks that she is seeing things that aren’t supposed to be there.
I have been told before that she has a very warm aura and that she is a healer. I would like to be able to help her, I hate seeing her so afraid!! I do believe her and I would like to support this part of her, I just don’t have any experience with this and I don’t know where to turn from here.
I have just recently lost my job and we can’t afford any expensive readings like from Chip Coffee. We live in Wisconsin, close to Minnesota. Please help, we are both exhausted from being up so much.
Thank you,
Kimber
Kimber, please supply your daughter’s first name only. Thanks
Caron
Hi! I’m at a crossroads & not sure what to do. My Mother is what you would call “sensitive”, as well as myself. My oldest daughter is what I have called since she was born an “old soul”; my middle daughter is becoming sensitive & I’m not sure how to calm her fears. She is the worry-wart in the family & takes everything to heart. Lately she has been having panic attacks & can’t give my husband or me any solid reasons as to why. Just this evening my oldest daughter said she saw Paw-Paw my Grandfather who passed away on April 27th of this past year; my husband claims he saw him this past Sunday night in our kitchen. How do I talk to her about what shes feeling/seeing without scaring her more than what she is now?
It’s me again – I ran out of room. The other question I have is how do I tune in to what I feel/sense? Better yet, how do I fine tune my senses? I have memories of another woman being my mother or being places with my “mother” & my actual birth mother not knowing any of the places or people who lived there. I vividly remember telling a classmate about the bright light inHeaven & that one day I would go back. This is when I was 5 – I’m 36 now. I have a “memory” of flying & “looking” out of a womans belly, although my mother had never flown while pregnant with me. When I sense something about to happen, I’m “drawn” to a person – not knowing until after the fact – & that person will pass away. I thank-you for your time & any help you may have to offer!
Hi Tiffany, your question regarding your daughter and her panic attacks requires a book purchase – Help Kids Cope With Stress & Trauma by Godoe and Goode- see amazon.com. To prevent panic attacks, there are five methods in the book from breathing to touch to assist her in maintain a body and mind that can stay relaxed.
I don’t have any “how tos” for talking with kids about their visions and intuition. Listening to them and offering yourself as a witness to their living the event works the best. Kids need to EXPRESS all this pent up energy and anxiety, and to have a parent willing to take a walk so the child can unwind is absolute magic! Did you mom ever do that for you? Mine did.
Treating all of this as normal for you family, an ordinary part of your day is the best way to handle the events. for your family, this is normal. Enjoy it and have fun with it.
The fact that your memories are opening is fun, isn’t it? I hope you keep a diary, as it will become a record of how you really learned to trust yourself, your gifts, and use them in your life. Wow, wouldn’t it be great if you and your daughter kept diaries, or drawing journeys together?
So what else do you remember?
Caron
Caron,
I am glad to find this site. 2 years ago I was in the middle of a very bad relationship. I begun medication to help my depression etc. I hated being at home because it reminded me of my ‘partner’. I spent many nights walking alone because nature calmed me down. I am very sensitive to these things. The first time I saw ’someone’ walking towards me, I thought it was a person, and then they disappeared. I was very scared, but after a while, I got used to them. They never looked directly at me, it was like someone mowing their lawn- they would walk beside me but never speak or look at me. In due time, they comforted me. To be walking alone at 2am, I was incredibly distraught that I had no fear. Sometimes I would feel them there but I would not see them. They would just walk beside me. They made me feel safe.
I only see them now when I have not slept for a while or am extremely stressed. I blame it on my medication but I know that it is more than that. If I were every to become really distressed again, I welcome them. They have only ever helped me in desperate times.
I am diagnosed ADHD and for those with it, there is a common curse that labels you ‘hypersensitive’. I remember times I was extremely upset, i would sit at the jetty and I could hear the wind and water screaming in my ears.
I behave confident and I know people love me, but I am scared and I would never tell anyone. I fee like I am going nowhere. What can you do? Smile and look a but charming. I don’t have time for that
Hello Joyce
I invite you to enjoy your sensitivity and learn to use your gift. As many as one-fourth of the population has a temperament that is sensitive. I am one of them, and long ago had to make a specific choice to live a lifestyle which brought me balance, meaning I could never have a 9 to 5 job, like flickering lights, constant droning of office sounds, bombardment by loud sounds of construction. You sound like you have done the same thing, found your rhythms and that glorious quiet time between 2 and 4 AM when the rest of the world is quiet.
If you are not familiar with the research and books by Elaine Aron, you might want to look up her books and workbooks for sensitive people. Support groups around the country have formed in support of the sensitive population. Many of us find it difficult to live in modern world bombardment. Also the work of Judith Orloff and her book might be of help to you. As a sensitive teen, her parents found her a psychiatrist who was astute enough to recognize her temperament. Today, as an empath, she helps a lot of other people stay connected to their gifts. and we all had to learn to use them. You relay your world from a very aware place. So I wonder, do you use your intuitive gifts?
cheers
caron
I have a 12 year old daughter who has seen spirits for as long as we both can remember. Some are “black balls” and some are clear full figure, and some are dark shadows. She and I talk openly about the things she sees. It has become a natural part of her life. She says sometime she can see their “stories”. I want to help her with this ability as much as I can. What can I do? Who can we talk to?
And I forgot to mention that VERY often the spirits follow her home. She has to tell them to leave
Hi Julie, first of all, please buy the book Raising Intuitive children which offers excellent information in support of any of the six types of intuitive intelligences that children may demonstrate, including being psychic. Let me say “thank you” for helping your daughter determine that this is the a normal part of her personality and temperament. Two things that I see in children is feeling confident to say no as well as the lack of discernment in who they hang out with, excuse the pun.
Can you fill me in on how discerning you think she is Julie? Does just any spirit hang out with her? And where has she been that spirits follow her home? This will help me know how to guide her to the kinds of spirits who can assist her.
C
Hi Caron,
Well, she told me that most of the spirits don’t bother or frighten her. But, there have been instances that she has rushed to my side because of the”bad feeling” a spirit gives. She tells me she doesn’t like these kind. And your question about where she has been that spirits follow her? It would be easier to ask where she hasn’t been. She has had them follow her from houses, parks, shops in the historical area, the courthouse, and the list goes on. She sees what she describes as black orbs daily. Walking down an alley, sitting in the car, playing outside, even at school. She has asked the spirits to appear in photos for my sister-in-law on a visit to an old graveyard. And they did!! She comes in contact quite often. I can always tell when she sees them. People seem to associate spirits with “haunted” places, but she sees them at home. In our apartment for no reason at all. Its like they are drawn to her and come to “visit” and then leave. Sometimes staying for minutes to days at a time. She isn’t afraid but wants to know why they come to her or follow her. I will certainly buy the book you recommended. (I would also like to tell you that she was born 3 months premature and nearly died at birth. While flying on a helicopter to a nearby hosp they had to land because she suddenly started breathing on her own and they had to remove the tube in her long that was breathing for her. It was Easter Sunday…she was a tiny miracle that day.)
Thank you for any guidance you can offer us
Julie and Hope
Dear Julie
I think the best way to explain to Hope about all of the ghosts is to explain that she can see into the Other Side, and that is natural for her, and she can learn to turn her heart light lower or higher by an turing an imaginary imaginary dial in her head. The lower her heart light, the less they can see her in theory. This works for most children. In answer to why do they hang around her, because they can and she can see them. You can explain, they also hang around you, but you cannot see them, just like you don’t see the stars are still in the sky. As she grows older, she can tell all of them to go away and leave her alone. Tell her to feel free to push back on those who intrude in her world. How she works with spirit walkers is exactly the same as she would work with people with physical bodies who hang around, bug her or intrude on her space. So now, tis for all to accept the fact that this is part of her world. Think of all of us folks in physical bodies sharing our multi-dimensional world with spirits in nonphysical world. They are spirit walkers…walkers in nonphysical worlds.
Your daughter’s wonderful story is not the first I have heard of the phenomenal resilience of her young soul who came in prematurely and survived. According to my research with children, and also with PMH Atwater’s research in children who experience near-death states, sometimes the door to the Other Side simply stays open for these children we accept this as their everyday reality and treat it as her gift just as thought she had an interest in piano and wanted to take music lessons. Sometimes the connection to the other side is part of their survival to be here now, at this time. Ask you daughter to call upon her personal angel, and she may remember the body of light who sustained her on easter sunday. I can see the brightest light directly behind her, not intrusive, but available if asked for touch, energy or confirmation. There are many more strategies for helping your daughter stay connected in the book, but I hope this gives you a good start. How else can I help you?
Hi Caron,
I sent a lengthy message about two weeks ago and I can find it or a response. Where should I be looking?
Thanks,
Stephanie
We purchased a little stuffed animal at a tag sale a couple weeks ago. My 6-year old slept with it and each night he would wake up hysterically crying that there’s a little boy in his nightmare that has dirty hands, he keeps trying to wash them clean as a mean man stands over him, but he just can’t get his dirty hands clean. Being intuitive myself, I quickly thought that maybe it was the stuffed animal. I took the toy out of his room for two nights, and no nightmares. Just to test my theory, I put it back in and the nightmare came back. I remember where we purchased it. Should I return and say something to the sellers? I’m afraid that something horrible may have happened or is happening in that house – but to what extent should I pursue it? I feel that we have some sort of obligation to do something. Any insight would be greatly appreciated.
Hi Becca, wow I read your post and when my eyes saw “little stuffed animal,” my whole body shivered. bravo for your intuition, testing your theory and finding your son a new toy. To answer the question, my guidance indicates that the best course of action, for the higher good, is to bury the stuffed animal or to move to the trash bin so the energy is not passed on. You can also clear the energy of the animal before moving it on by moving light from your heart, down your arms to your hands and surrounding the animal.
Regarding your obligation, i see no obligation to return to the owner, or to take any action, as you are completing the cycle of that energy ripple with the toy, not extending it. Make sense? If YOU personally feel that you are obligated, then always follow your personal truth, as their are always lessons and truths we learn as follow out guts! If you have more questions on this, please ask. I’ll be online all week.
Caron
whoops that should be “there are always lessons…”
Hi Caron. Thank you for your advice. I will try to clear the negative energy and then toss it in the nearest dumpster! I was afraid maybe it was the ghost of a little boy that was harmed by an adult because he had dirty hands, and was trying to communicate with us. But you’re right, I need to end the cycle and not extend it.
Thank you,
Becca
Hi Becca
I wanted to clarify two points because I think you are very aware, and there is a very subtle clue here that could teach all of us something. The toy seemed to be the link to the little boy that your son was dreaming about, and we both felt the toy be the comfort tool for the boy. I feel the spirit of the boy would have been a consistent presence in trying to get through to you and your son. In other words, once contact was made, the spirit would have been consistently present. Because the memory pattern seemed only associated with the toy, I feel it was the imprint of the child’s trauma upon the toy. Your son seems to have psychometry, a sense of reading the patterns and energy of “things” and this is good to know also. Thanks for sharing and asking – good for all of us to be aware of.
Caron
Hi, I have a 2yr old son who has been seeing a boy in our house for a couple of months and lately it has been really effecting his sleep and mine. It used to be only in our hallway and he would say that the boy is mean and he would throw things at it. For the past two weeks he has been waking up in the middle of the night running into our bedroom. He doesn’t seem scared and almost every night talks and plays with the boy for hrs. It has been really hard getting him to go to sleep because he wants to talk and play. We don’t know if this is an imaginary friend or something much more. My son Cameron says the boy in our bedroom is nice but looks yucky. I asked Cameron what does the boy want? He says he wants daddy and went over to show him our wedding pictures and kept saying “no my daddy and mommy”. Cameron has a twin brother Jacob who is often in our room at night because he hears his brother get up. I don’t know if Jacob sees the boy for sure but he points and says ut ough, ut ough and gets scared. If that wasn’t enough my 10yr old daughter Jessica has been seeing dark figures of a man for several months now. She says she is not scared and feels like he is just watching out for her. I honestly felt maybe this was just her imagination but she says she sees the man at night, day, inside, outside and she is confused with why this is happening. Just about 4 nights ago she was extremely scared for the first time. She sleeps in the finished basement and was going downstairs to go to bed when she heard a man whistling a song. She thought at first maybe she left the tv on but when she went over to that area no tv was on and she freaked out. She said the song sounded really familiar and she felt really sick to her stomach. Please, help me figure out if they are really seeing ghosts or if it’s their imagination. My gut says it’s very real and if so how can I help them. Thank you.
Jennifer,if you live in the US, I’d like to offer you a quick phone call to review the energy in your home and see how we help your children. It might be more helpful to speak to you directly. I live in TX and am on central time? What time zone are you in? When do you have about 20 or 30 minutes to give me a call?
Please email caron30 at gmail com